Bebe Akinboade

HOW TO CONTROL YOUR ANGER

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Anger is a completely normal, usually healthy, human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems—problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life.  You can control your anger, and you have a responsibility to do so. In this article, BEBEAKINBOADE.COM brings to you ways on how to control your anger.


RECOGNIZE YOUR ANGER SIGNS
Your heart beats faster and you breathe more quickly, preparing you for action. You might also notice other signs, such as tension in your shoulders or clenching your fists. If you’ve got a history of losing control,then get out of the situation if you notice these signs. 

THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK
In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to say something you’ll later regret. Take a few moments to collect your thoughts before saying anything. You can also count to 10, this gives you time to cool down, so you can think more clearly and overcome the impulse to lash out.

BREATHE SLOWLY
Breathe out for longer than you breathe in, and relax as you breathe out. You automatically breathe in more than out when you’re feeling angry, and the trick is to breathe out more than in. This will calm you down effectively and help you think more clearly.

ONCE YOU’RE CALM, EXPRESS YOUR ANGER
As soon as you’re thinking clearly, express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. State your concerns and needs clearly and directly, without hurting others or trying to control them.

BETTER COMMUNICATION
Angry people tend to jump to—and act on—conclusions, and some of those conclusions can be very inaccurate. The first thing to do if you’re in a heated discussion is slow down and think through your responses. Don’t say the first thing that comes into your head, but slow down and think carefully about what you want to say. At the same time, listen carefully to what the other person is saying and take your time before answering. Keeping your cool can keep the situation from becoming a disastrous one.

GET SOME EXERCISE
Exercise as part of your daily life is a good way to get rid of irritation and anger. Bring down your general stress levels with exercise and relaxation. Running, walking, swimming, yoga and meditation are just a few activities that can reduce stress. 
If you feel your anger escalating, go for a brisk walk or run, or spend some time doing other enjoyable physical activities.

IDENTIFY POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS
Instead of focusing on what made you mad, work on resolving the issue at hand. Remind yourself that anger won’t fix anything and might only make it worse.

DON’T HOLD A GRUDGE
Forgiveness is a powerful tool. If you allow anger and other negative feelings to crowd out positive feelings, you might find yourself swallowed up by your own bitterness or sense of injustice. But if you can forgive someone who angered you, you might both learn from the situation. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to behave exactly as you want at all times.

USE HUMOR
“Silly humor” can help defuse rage in a number of ways.Use humor to help you face what’s making you angry and, possibly, any unrealistic expectations you have for how things should go. 
There are two cautions in using humor. First, don’t try to just “laugh off” your problems; rather, use humor to help yourself face them more constructively. Second, don’t give in to harsh, sarcastic humor; that’s just another form of unhealthy anger expression.

GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK
Give yourself short breaks during times of the day that tend to be stressful. A few moments of quiet time might help you feel better prepared to handle what’s ahead without getting irritated or angry.

SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP
Learning to control anger is a challenge for everyone at times. Consider seeking help for anger issues if your anger seems out of control, causes you to do things you regret or hurts those around you.

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